Hold Your Stone, Don’t Haul It Yet, Dr Abati! – By Debo Adejugbe

04 Sep

“They” in this piece refers to all the powerful “mumus”, Barawo incorporated, attention-grabbing praise singers, the irritating, self-loathed “govtivists”, the tactless and dumb-looking, blubbering, ex-hacktivists, collective old men without shame, the factually challenged crowd of cassava bread addicts, the press-loving drooling nitwittery association of Nigeria, who seem to be in competition among themselves to parade President Goodluck Jonathan’s fabricated achievements and foist it on us as facts. This army of government sponsored and depressed no-do-gooders is so diverse; many of them actually know why and how they are shielding the President from proper scrutiny – they are paid handsomely to do so.

The clear danger to government’s business is that we have a lot of expired and redundant advisers repeating same rubbish clichés and too many mistaken intelligent persons in government unmasking their idiocy, lending relevance to cassava-induced conclusions. Hold on. I don’t want to be misunderstood. I am not saying nobody should work with the Nigerian President. I spent some time learning that street maxim: “a doctorate does not equate to wisdom”. Public position comes with its own share of amnesia and thoughtlessness . But the turncoats, senile old men, attention grabbing crowd in the presidency must be guided by facts.

Hold your stone. Don’t haul it yet. Shhh. Wait, Dr Olodo! They have spent the last fourteen months working with President Jonathan.

They followed him everywhere of note and can obviously write a whole book on his Presidency so far, but you won’t get to read that until much later because there is still an abundance of wealth they want to amass. What they can report, for now, is that the President is grossly misrepresented by his aides. Too many of them are untruthful and economic with facts about him. People criticize him out of ignorance because if they know the truth, they will stone his convoy at every opportunity. They abuse him out of mischief when they should have never voted for him. And the opposition doesn’t make things easy at all – they clearly, are not offering a better alternative. Can we look at a number of issues?

They say he is not a clueless President. You are wrong. He is clueless.

Nobody is more deluded about the Nigerian Project than President Jonathan. President Jonathan is doing his utmost best to blame everyone but himself on his failure to transform Nigeria. Ordinary Nigerians know and are tired of this. Those parading themselves as advisers claiming that the President has the support of Nigerians represent only themselves and their befuddled minds.

President Jonathan is overwhelmed, lacking in ideas and surrounded by neophytes, He has successfully made himself a butt of jokes, leaving people to second-guess his motives. He understands the complexity of prosecuting corruption cases in Nigeria and he is milking it to commit a full frontal corruption-assault on our treasury. He is the bane of the common person, particularly the children of all blue collar workers who never wore shoes or got a chance to eat three-square meals, and whose mothers and aunties could never be part of policy-making processes – He is making sure people see them as mentally ill equipped and ideologically weak for any position of value.

When he spoke about not wearing shoes as a child, he meant every word of it literally just like MKO did in ’93, and he had to shed tears to drive home his point. But I have heard some persons metaphorically attributing it to Nigerians’ simplistic view. Attention needs to be drawn to the fact that his henchmen are painting him as an Ijaw President (even if not consciously), the fact on ground and the President’s body language has not dispelled these notions. Jonathan has made Tompolo, Asari, Clark and the likes his unofficial spokespersons to underline his ethnic sentiments. He sees himself as weak without persons of shady character in his employ. He is focused on looting our treasury blind. He wants to transform Nigeria into a Cassava republic.

He knows Nigerians want regular power supply. Rather than consolidating on the improvement seen in some areas, 4, 400 MW has been turned into a song with several remixed versions coming out every passing day. If a country of 150 Million people sees this as an unparalleled achievement when 100,000 MW is required to make Nigeria an industrialized nation, then we should tell the apologists to shut up!

He knows Nigerians want infrastructure. But all we get is a threat to a contractor to fix the carnage called Lagos-Ibadan expressway, two years into his Presidency. A Minister has been told to fix the East-West road and get it done quickly – that should sound irritating to even a bandog like Abati. Directives are being given to relevant agencies to get corrupt persons to answer for their misdeeds, but Diezani Madueke is still the “OverLady” of Aso Manor despite overwhelming evidence pointing us to her culpability in the Subsidy action film. He is strengthening Nigeria’s foreign relations by galloping around the globe doing absolutely nothing trying to beat OBJ’s record – He should explain RIO. He is said to be transforming the agriculture sector, Fertilizer distribution and Cassava bread innovation falls into the revolutionary trend Dr Abati is pointing out. And more……… (Obviously, “they” ran out of reasons why Mr President is not clueless). Also, for Dr Abati, there should be a feast every time Mr President announces one of his white elephant policies, if a PhD holder can be this warped…..we are in big trouble.

Dr Abati exquisitely painted what nightmares meant to him, but what he failed to point out about the situation is: No one in Aso Rock deemed it fit to disclaim Tompolo, Asari and his wife, Edwin Clark……or whoever see it necessary to attack the President’s adversaries. They come gun blazing when the “twittering addicts” and “Children of anger” decide to stick the boot in.

For Dr Abati to actually list out few positions, with corresponding states of origin, bandying it like some sort of achievement says more about the state of his mind than the President’s – even by his calculation, the reason he wrote them out was defeated.

Mr President gets to the office very early and leaves very late. I think we should all clap for the president, he is doing what an average Nigerian does with his life, but without the attendant luxury obtainable in Aso Rock. What Dr Abati didn’t tell us is whether the President spends all that time playing solitaire – we definitely want to know why he wastes his precious time doing nothing in the office. Dr Jonathan is on Facebook, Twitter, email, SMS,
BB, and he reads. And he writes. All according to Abati. There are countless trolls on Facebook, Twitter, Email, SMS, BB – they all read and write, so what is Abati’s point? I’m beginning to think Ikebe Super is still in vogue, that must be what the President reads as he doesn’t think like someone who reads. What am I saying? I might be wrong though. Listing out people you intend to bribe for support obviously pass for writing these days.

Appointment of women now counts as an achievement? Sacking them must make him a devil, judging by Diezani’s case. Mr President is definitely not clueless in that area. Abati went on to dawdle out a list of women in the employment of Mr President. He obviously doesn’t get it, we want performers and not a list to remind us they are women. Who cares?!

They say Mr. President doesn’t drink. He does and we know it. You’ve only worked with him for fourteen months, you definitely don’t know him like the people he grew up with. Stop feeding us Lies. Lies. Lies.

They heard that the President spends billions on feeding. Its a shame that they failed to break down the President’s feeding budget in an attempt to dispel the lies of the “Children of Anger”; facts failed them and they had to grapple at straws to make their point that Mr President is not a glutton. Well, we know that whoever budgets Three million naira a day for eating Fish pepper soup, cassava bread, slices of yam, rice, boiled plantain, fruits and vegetables….and claims to eat a little, is not only a glutton but a thief and first class “wobiliki Wobiya”.

Here is a man who is an epitome of cluelessness mistaking it for simplicity. The thing about the President’s advisers and handlers is that they just cannot challenge their benefactor to sit up. This is the Abati Complex. Abati finds it hard to tear into his benefactor because he is now in the inner circle, looting, drinking and eating cassava bread. And just like Abati threw the words at Jonathan out of uncontrollable desire to get noticed, these power-mumus are out to throw any kind of mumbo-jumbo to see whether we will gulp it all, hence all their lies and anger about the President’s critics.

Let me end by saying that the “children of Anger” are a simple bunch, but simplicity is not naivety, we can definitely unleash our pent-up anger if pushed to the wall. Beware! It is obviously an act of desperation for “they” to liken President Jonathan to such great men as Abraham Lincoln, Mahatma Gandhi, Martin Luther King, and Kwame Nkrumah, who, one way or the other have shaped the world that we live in by simplifying what people like Dr Goodluck have complicated.

Now is the time to “Pick your stones. Haul it fiercely. Make some noise and run down Dr Olodo”. He gave us a lenghty newsy article, so irrelevant and purposeless, valueless, that it actually makes a mockery of his purported intelligence.

Follow the writer @deboadejugbe


Twitter: @ Femiolas


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Posted by on September 4, 2012 in Thoughts


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